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Post by Landon Rederick on Feb 15, 2009 13:25:10 GMT -5
“Yeah, I called you a bitch because you’re acting like one. What, are you the only the one that’s allowed to get angry in this family? You were busting my balls, as usual.” Landon expected Tristise to be mad, but not like this. He could understand her behavior the last time they had spoken. The scene then must have been a lot for her to take in. But now she was definitely overreacting. He had done nothing wrong this time. He stood up for himself.
He let himself be grabbed and pushed up against the wall. There’s no sense in fighting her. He’d only be digging this whole deeper and he’d probably get his ass kicked. Her lycan strength was too much for him. “You know, excuse me for getting angry, but what the fuck do you want me to do, kiss your feet? I said I was sorry. I can’t do anything else. I don’t have to prove anything to you. This isn’t your life. I’m not changing for you.” But then something strange happened. Tierney started to speak up for him. Why?
When Tristise let him go he straightened up and listened to Tierney tell her how pathetic he was. And he couldn’t get mad at her it was true. It was really upsetting. She held on to him, practically begging him to explain to his sister how pathetic he was. Words were building up in his chest and he was trying to keep them down but he couldn’t anymore. They just came up like word vomit. “What?! What do you want me to say? You want me to tell her that I only went to the dance because I was tired of being alone? Or do you want me to tell her that I didn’t even dance with anyone? Or about how I had to sit back and watch that fake bastard propose while I tried not to punch him in the face? Is that good? Am I pathetic enough for you now?”
As soon as the words left Landon’s mouth he regretted them. This wasn’t something he even enjoyed thinking about. And the words just escaped him before he’d even had the time to think about them. He wasn’t even sure of the meaning of what he said. “If this is what it’s going to be like every time we interact, Tris, then I’m not so sure I want it. I’ve had enough.”
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Tierney Harper
slytherin student
sixth year the earth elemental
[b]why'd you have to win me over[/b][br][i]just as I took the world on my shoulders?[/i]
Posts: 129
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Post by Tierney Harper on Feb 15, 2009 14:21:21 GMT -5
She didn't mean to make him upset. She didn't mean to make him feel pathetic... She just wanted him to explain to Tris that he had changed a bit. Tierney wanted Landon to say that he regretted his actions and was working to make amends. He got so angry though and she wasn't sure why she wanted to cry from his yelling at her. She dropped his arm and locked her jaw, trying to blink back tears that were beginning to sting her eyes.
Instead of crying - which she really didn't want to do in front of Landon especially over this - she tried to be angry at him for what he said about Lucian, for anything... Yet, when she spoke her voice was trembling, but not from anger. "I just... How can you of all people call Lucian fake? You spoke to him so briefly... you don't know him!" His words weren't really registering in her head. She was confused. "Why do you hate him so damn much?"
Despite trying as hard as she had a stray tear still trickled down her cheek. "I was hoping for some damn support for this wedding! It's hard enough to marry a demon and a man I don't love... but to have others not support me in this decision... I have to do it for my family or would you prefer my people kept fighting and dying over nothing? Can't you just try and be supportive since you know I want to do this to help people I care for?" She covered her mouth after she spoke, realizing how she sounded... realizing she admitted she didn't love Lucian when these past few months she had been pretending she did.
The tears pooled so quickly in her eyes she couldn't blink them away. Without another thought she ran from the room, wiping her cheeks as she went and headed back for her bedroom. "Stupid, so stupid..." She muttered to herself. How could she be so stupid? Only Tris knew she didn't really love Lucian and that was how she wanted it. She wanted everyone else to think she did and she was happy - especially her family and friends who worried about her. While Landon didn't care for her or worry about her if he knew it would be something he could hold over her, use as blackmail later.
Deep down she didn't think he would, but she wanted to believe it. She wanted to think that was why she was so upset to have told him the truth... not that she wanted to appear strong in front of him or sure of her own decisions...
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Tristise Rederick
witch
ministry undercover daily prophet secretary lycaness
[size=1][b]I just wanna set you on fire[/b][br][i]so I won't have to burn alone[/i][/size]
Posts: 77
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Post by Tristise Rederick on Feb 15, 2009 15:39:19 GMT -5
Landon was right. She was being a bitch to him and maybe she was a little over the top... but he should know that was how she was. He'd known her his entire life so really it was nothing new. He should be used to it.
Meanwhile Tierney pushed for him to tell her how he changed and she waited patiently to hear. If Tierney thought he had changed he probably really had. Even if she still had a crush on him she wasn't blind to his flaws which was what Tris loved about her. Landon didn't seem so eager to explain himself. In fact, he snapped at Tierney... or in general... she couldn't really tell.
Tristise narrowed her eyes as her brother yelled. "Landon Riley Rederick ---" She was cut off as Tierney, who was visibly upset, started to speak. Tris didn't have to be in lycan form to feel her pain - it was laced in every syllable she spoke. "Tierney..." Tierney left the room in a rush and Tris sighed. She felt bad... she supported Tierney's decision as much as she could, but the girl was just beyond upset about the whole thing - even if she pretended she wasn't. Tierney was too strong for her own good sometimes and had way too strong a sense of duty.
"You didn't have to be so angry with her. I don't think she meant to make you feel pathetic. She was trying to help..." For the first time in months her voice wasn't harsh when speaking to or about Landon. "I'm glad to hear you're supposedly changing and - unlike Tierney- I'm thrilled to hear you don't like Lucian... though I wonder about why you don't... why you care that you had to see him propose to your archnemesis..." Tris raised an eyebrow and a hint of a smirk flitted on her lips.
"Still though, Tierney is stubborn and she wants to help her people. She can only do that by marrying the boy so you really should support her decision or at least not insult Lucian to her face. Pretend to like him for her sake. She hates having to marry someone she doesn't love and a demon to boot, you heard her, it's hard enough, but to have her friends and family disapprove when they're who she's trying to help will kill her..." Tris muttered, gaze drifting to the door Tierney ran out. She turned back to Landon and then shrugged before walking away toward a chair and sitting down.
"Some day I want to hear why you want to punch Lucian, some day soon you have to tell Tierney why." She curled up in the chair and picked up a book on the side table next to her. "So Jimmy, you haven't been climbing in the tree, have you? You know it'll make your fur all sappy and gross." Deftly she turned her end of the conversation to her youngest brother, leaving Landon free to do whatever he wanted.
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Post by Landon Rederick on Feb 16, 2009 2:33:31 GMT -5
Landon didn’t really know when he’d gotten so angry or when he started yelling, but once he got going it was kind of hard to bring him back down. However, when his eyes fell onto Tierney’s face, he realized that his behavior must be getting out of hand. Her eyes started to glisten and it made Landon’s heart tighten up. Tierney wasn’t going to cry though. She was a hard ass, just like his sister. Nothing could make her break down.
Once she started asking questions, Landon knew that he’d opened up a can of worms that he’d never be able to close. The words seemed to flutter past Tierney’s lips frantically interrogating Landon about his unjustifiable hatred for her fiancé. He didn’t move to answer the questions because, frankly, he didn’t have any answers. He didn’t know why he didn’t like Lucian, but the boy man seemed very fake to him. There was something about him that seemed very one dimensional, even in the way that he interacted with Tierney. A relationship between two people soon to be married should be much deeper than that.
As a tear fell down Tierney’s cheek Landon froze. She was crying and it was his fault. She must’ve thought that the anger was directed toward her, which was in no way true. He was just frustrated at this situation. Then the dam broke and everything seemed to flow right out of Tierney in a rush. She had obviously told him things that she had no intention of sharing. So she didn’t love Lucian. Landon knew it all along. Or at least that’s what he wanted to believe.
Landon mentally cursed himself as Tierney ran away crying. Nothing was supposed to happen like this. Only moments ago they were having normal conversation. Now she was in tears. Landon hit the wall with his fist in frustration. How was he going to fix this? “I wasn’t angry with her. Not at all. I was just…frustrated…at this whole thing. This got so out of hand.” Landon snapped at Tristise. In his opinion, this was all her fault. If she had just left them alone, they wouldn’t be in this mess. “And I don’t hate her. Why would she think that? Granted, I’m still pretty upset about all the crap she pulled but it’s water under the bridge at this point. What’s done is done. And she at least still talks to me. One of the few people I can actually have genuine conversation with. I could never talk to one of those other girls. They weren’t interested in talking.”
He growled at himself. If he’d known this, he wouldn’t have said the things he’d said. He would have been supportive if that’s what she wanted…even if he didn’t like it. Her passion for helping people isn’t something that was clear to him until now. But he would stand by her decision (with a frown) if that’s what she wanted. He wasn’t going to like Lucian and he wasn’t going to pretend to either, but if he had to interact with him then he would be civil. He has been so far. Lucian probably didn’t even know that Landon didn’t like him.
“I really don’t have anything to say to right now,” he said as he turned to his sister. All she had been doing as of late was making his life extremely difficult and uncomfortable. He turned away and followed in the direction of Tierney. When he got to her room he lightly tapped on the door with his knuckles. “Hey, can I come in? I’m sorry.”
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Tierney Harper
slytherin student
sixth year the earth elemental
[b]why'd you have to win me over[/b][br][i]just as I took the world on my shoulders?[/i]
Posts: 129
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Post by Tierney Harper on Feb 16, 2009 2:54:22 GMT -5
Tierney ran straight to her room, shut the door behind her, and threw the lock with a trembling hand. Before she knew it she was curled up in her bed under the covers all but sobbing her heart out. It was just one stupid thing after another with her, especially with anything concerning Landon lately. She didn't understand why she couldn't hold her tongue around him. It was so easy with everyone else. It should have been easiest with him!
It wasn't though... at all.
She cried a little longer, but the tears eventually slowed to a trickle. Just in time too. A knock on her door was quickly followed by Landon's voice asking to be let in and apologizing. She didn't want to see him or talk to him. She wanted to be alone to cry and wallow in her idiocy. Still... it wasn't every day Landon Rederick apologized. It was a rare occurrence reserved pretty much only for Tristise or when his parents demanded it. Despite her better judgment and her protesting brain her body was crawling out of bed over to the door and unlocking it. She never said a word and she didn't open the door, just unlocked it, before going back to her bed and hiding under the covers again.
She was such a coward at times.
Tierney couldn't even bring herself to see Landon... not with tear stains on her cheeks. She had too look a wreck, not to mention weak. To cry over his stupid tirade was ridiculous and shouldn't have happened. And she should never have let him get to her so much so that she let slip her real feelings for Lucian or lack thereof. She was just confused. He should have been indifferent about the whole situation. He shouldn't have cared what was going on with her. She made his life Hell, ruined his reputation... and yet he didn't like Lucian, he didn't think she should marry him. Did he care? Why would he care? He had every reason not to and yet it seemed he might.
Her brain had a lot of trouble wrapping around the idea of Landon caring about what happened to her. She liked the thought though... and that just scared her more. She was supposed to be over him. She was. She was getting married in a year. She didn't have a crush on Landon anymore. She was taken. He wasn't her type. The past was the past. Lucian was her fiance. Lucian would be her husband and Landon would be... Landon.
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Post by Landon Rederick on Feb 17, 2009 0:25:28 GMT -5
How the hell was Landon going to get out of this mess? He tried to think of solutions as he waited outside of Tierney’s bedroom door. And as he stared at the door, nothing he came up with seemed good enough. How was he going to explain his behavior and attitude when he really didn’t understand it himself? He’d probably just start talking and let whatever happens happen. She probably won’t let him in anyway.
Surprisingly, he heard the click of the lock on her door and assumed that meant he was allowed to come in. He suddenly felt unjustifiably nervous and it was kind of annoying him. He was being stupid. Taking a deep breath, Landon slowly opened the door to the room, making sure to shut it behind him. He saw her body curled up under the covers and he could tell that she was crying. Landon was never really good at consoling or comforting people, but it made his heart hurt. He hated to see someone that he was close to hurt, especially if it was his fault. This wasn’t going to be easy.
He sat on the edge of her bed, near where he thought her head was, and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” he said again. “I wasn’t yelling at you. I was just angry…at everything. I just…” Oh dear. This was going to get compromising. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt.” But she didn’t love Lucian. Even if she was doing it for the wrong reasons, in theory, she couldn’t get hurt because she didn’t love him. This wasn’t about her. This was about her people. As much as he felt that this was wrong, she’d made her decision and there wasn’t anything he could do about it. He’d expressed his distaste for the idea and all it did was make her upset. “And I don’t want you to think that I don’t support you…Do I agree? No. But if this is what you really want, who am I to stand in your way. A true friend offers his support, so that’s what I will do.” Friends, right.
But Landon was starting to question their relationship himself. His motives didn’t make sense. His desire to protect her seemed unjustified. He caught himself thinking about her at times and in ways he shouldn’t. All of these things pointed to one reasonable explanation, something Landon would not admit. It just wasn’t true. There was another reason, he just hadn’t figured it out yet.
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Tierney Harper
slytherin student
sixth year the earth elemental
[b]why'd you have to win me over[/b][br][i]just as I took the world on my shoulders?[/i]
Posts: 129
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Post by Tierney Harper on Feb 17, 2009 0:51:09 GMT -5
Her chest tightened as she felt the bed shift with Landon's weight. How long had it been since the boy had been in her room? At least five years because she had been away that long... but most likely even longer since the last two years she was with the Rederick family she had started to mature and actually realize what she felt for Landon was a crush - more than friendship.
He apologized some more and she wondered if perhaps her fears that he'd use her words as blackmail were unfounded... and that was the only reason she was upset she let the truth slip... really. “And I don’t want you to think that I don’t support you…Do I agree? No. But if this is what you really want, who am I to stand in your way. A true friend offers his support, so that’s what I will do.”
Friends.
It was surprising how they went from enemies to friends quite quickly. It was amazing what some empathy could accomplish. Still, because of the sudden change in status Tierney had yet to grow accustomed to it, even a few weeks after they decided they would try back in the courtyard. She had cried then too a bit. Not as much as now, but a bit. Funny how the boy always found her when she was crying.
Knowing that Landon wasn't going to use the words against her, knowing he wanted to try to support her, made her happy. It cheered her up quickly enough and she removed the blankets fro over her head and sat up enough to hug him. She still wasn't sure she could say anything. What could she say? She didn't love Lucian. She kept attempting to convince herself otherwise, but she just didn't love him. End of story. There was no room in her heart for the demon boy... man... whatever. She wasn't sure where all the space had gone (-coughlandoncough-), but it was gone and Lucian would have to deal. She doubted he even cared though.
"I'm sorry I got so upset too. I know you weren't yelling at me when I think about it. It's just... talking to Jimmy and mentioning how I'm set to be married in a little over a year, well it had me thinking and then with what you said... I started question what I wanted again and that's silly. I've already made up my mind and I've already reconsidered and every time I come up with the same conclusions and I still decide to marry Lucian. It's just painful to have to go through the whole process again and again." Tierney buried her face in his shoulder, breathing in his smell silently and taking comfort in their proximity.
She should not have been enjoying it as much as she was. At all. Especially not when she was thinking of Lucian - her fiance. It boggled her mind how she could do this, how she could be close to Landon, cling to him and not want to let go, and yet think of her future husband... what happened to her deep sense of loyalty and commitment? It wasn't like she would cheat on Lucian with Landon - she didn't even like him like that anymore (-coughliarcough-), but it still felt wrong and someone who didn't know the situation would definitely take it wrong... which made it wrong... and yet she didn't let go of him, didn't move away. She felt like a terrible person, seriously.
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Post by Landon Rederick on Feb 17, 2009 1:59:01 GMT -5
Friends.
Was it fair to label Landon and Tierney’s relationship a friendship? She did a lot of shit to him that a normal person would never forgive another for. She ruined him. Practically tore him apart, bit by bit until there was nothing left but the shell of a young man. And at the time, he hated her for it. Even to this day, he got a bad taste in his mouth when he thought of some of those things. Time for another mint. But even after everything that she had done he just couldn't bring himself to hate her. Lately, he'd been enjoying her company and conversation, things no one else would give him. He couldn't hate her for that.
But friends. Was that the correct way to label them? Friends were two people that cared about each other. Check….or at least a half of a check. He definitely cared about her. And he figured she cared about him. Hell, she'd even thrown herself in front of his crazy sister twice to save his sorry ass. Friends were on good terms. Wavy check. They were on good terms, most of the time. Friends could trust each other. This was a toughy. Landon doubted that Tierney felt she could trust him. Sometimes he wondered if he could trust her. With everything that she'd done before it was hard to say. Though, she hadn’t done anything in recent months to prove otherwise.
More than friends? Definitely not. Though Landon’s recent thoughts and feelings had him as confused as ever. Tierney did not want him. That was obvious. She probably only talked to him because she felt bad. And Landon wasn’t at all sure that he liked her. He hadn't had any feelings for a girl in while and was chalking it up to the fact that he must be going through withdrawal. It had nothing to do with her personally. Just a little crush. He’d get over it soon enough. Either way, though, it was dangerous. Whatever feelings he had, as misconstrued as they might be, he had to get rid of them.
"Don’t be sorry, Tierney. You didn't do anything wrong. I didn't even think about any of this from your point of view." He quickly returned the embrace when Tierney wrapped his arms around him. It felt really good. She mustn't hate him. Her she was hugging him. People didn't hug if they hated each other. "I can only imagine how much it must hurt to go through all of that." And he wanted to tell her that she didn't have to, but he'd already done enough of that. There was no changing her mind so he had to stop trying. He probably wasn't even doing it for the right reasons.
He brought his hand up to the back of her head and ran his fingers through her hair. That was friendly, right? He wanted to be there for her. Who knew how much time they had left anyway? He was sure that the closer and closer the wedding date got, the less and less he'd see her. And who cared what Lucian thought? Landon didn’t like the bastard anyway. He’d been civil so far and would continue to be for Tierney's sake. If that’s what she wanted, that’s what he would do.
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Tierney Harper
slytherin student
sixth year the earth elemental
[b]why'd you have to win me over[/b][br][i]just as I took the world on my shoulders?[/i]
Posts: 129
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Post by Tierney Harper on Feb 17, 2009 2:27:39 GMT -5
She had the urge to kiss him. And damn was it strong. Her heart seized and her skin tingled wherever it made contact with him. Her insides felt like they were on fire. Honestly, what was all that about? A simple touch like his hand in her hair could make her feel like that? It was crazy. Obviously she was just overly emotional. It wasn't because it was him
[/i] or anything. Certainly not. Tierney hugged Landon tighter as if that would make the feelings go away. It didn't. His being sweet didn't help matters either. That was probably the problem to begin with. His offhanded sweetness was so damn attractive. Honestly, he hardly needed his looks. If he just acted like this with girls at school they'd being falling all over themselves for his attention and it would be for better reasons. He could have a meaningful relationship if he acted like this. Tierney was tempted to tell him that, but some tiny part of her that her conscious brain did not acknowledge refused to let her tell him out of potential jealousy. "You know... I have to just remember that it's not so bad. Of all the guys I could be made to marry, Lucian is one of the better deals. He's sweet, charming, intelligent... trust me when I say most of the demons of his clan are not. In his family. I could have been made to marry any one of them and the others would not be nearly as nice or gentle with me." She pulled away just enough to look up at his face, but it proved to be a bad idea. She fought to keep her lips from puckering and to keep herself from leaning toward him. Quickly she looked away before she acted like a fool. She was too close, way too close. Still, she didn't pull out of his hold, didn't relinquish hers. "My only fears now are having to spend time with his family and wondering if I'll have one of my own. I wonder if Lucian wants children and if we should even have any. I mean a child would carry on the treaty... a half-demon child... but the child would also no doubt be hated by both sides. I just... I don't know. It's too soon to think about kids anyway. I just can't help it. The thoughts just pop into my head." Tierney groaned and slumped forward, forehead resting on Landon's shoulder again. "I want to be a child. I want to act like a child, think like a child... for as long as I can. I don't want to think about my marriage or children or anything until the end of seventh year when things need to be planned. It's just much easier said than done." Her childhood was being robbed from her and try as she might she could not fight it off. "Let's not talk about it. Tell me something funny or stupid. Anything to distract." She had had enough of their conversation already. A part of her wanted to talk to Landon about it, wanted to confess, wanted to complain, wanted to share... but a much larger part of her was scared still by everything and hurt by the talk. That larger part didn't want to be comforted, but made to forget. Comfort, it thought, could only get it so far. Forgetting, ignoring, pretending... would do the best job, as foolish as it sounded.[/blockquote][/blockquote]
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Post by Landon Rederick on Feb 20, 2009 3:18:57 GMT -5
There was something about this situation that was unnerving yet amazing all at the same time. On the one hand it bothered him that his feelings -or lack thereof- for Tierney were not exactly clear. One minute he felt like he shouldn't be able to stand her and the next he couldn’t stop thinking about her. He couldn’t stand people that were wishy-washy and it bothered him that he couldn't figure things out. On the other hand, Landon enjoyed spending time with her, whether it was moments like this (the few), or times that they were just hanging out.
Landon squeezed Tierney a little harder when she hugged him tighter. Her response to his touch brought a smile to his lips. He wondered if she behaved this way when Lucian hugged her? Did he even hug her? Did he know that she didn't love him? Was it mutual? Perhaps Lucian did know and they agreed to keep up the engagement anyway. He closed his eyes to rid himself of the thoughts and questions that were running through his head. Now was not the time. Tierney was in need of some comforting and he was going to do his best to give it to her. Who knew how long this was going to last anyway?
“Sure, sure.” Landon responded as Tierney spoke highly of Lucian. Be supportive. Right. This would be hard. “Hmmm…I suppose you’re right. It could be worse.” Of course, he could be sweet and charming. He was intelligent. And he could definitely be gentle with her. Not that it mattered. He didn’t want to marry Tierney. Really. Not at all. That one thing he was sure. He would probably never be married. Truth be told, he just didn't understand it. He didn't understand how people could be so in love that they would practically sign away their lives together. Maybe it happened in rare occasions, like with his parents. But Landon didn't feel like he was capable of loving someone that much.
“Can demons even produce children? Wouldn't they be mudblooded?” Honestly, the idea of her procreating with a demon disgusted him. It just wasn't natural. Pure-blooded wizards with pure-blooded wizards only. He wouldn’t say anything, though, because he didn't want to upset her again. “You know what? You’re right. It’s way too early to start thinking about children.” He didn’t want to think about her and children either.
Landon was surprised that after all this time, she still hadn’t moved away or relinquished her hold on him. It was nice. “I can understand that,” he agreed. Life as a child was so much simpler. He'd only gotten in trouble for his boyish prankster behavior back then. Now look at the messed he'd gotten himself into. “And you shouldn’t think about it if it’s going to bother you.” The fact that it bothered her said a lot. “Hmm…” Landon never really thought of himself as funny. But when ‘courting' a young lady, he pretty much knew the right things to say at the right times. This was not one of those moments and he really didn't want to sound stupid. He'd already done enough of that around her. "Well this isn’t really funny, sort of crazy actually. But a few nights I had a dream that I couldn't magic. Like, I woke up one day and I was a muggle. It was terrible! Could you imagine life without magic? I actually had to go to a muggle school…and ride a bus…that didn’t fly! What kind of ludicrousness is that?!...never mind that. What do you want to do for fun? We should do something..."
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