It's Over ((Closed for now))

[Landon Rederick]

It had been roughly three weeks since Tierney’s last letter. Landon must’ve read over one hundred times and still didn’t know what to write back. She didn’t sounds as excited to hear from him as she did before, but she still wrote back. She was making definite strides to break things off with Lucian. She’d even set a date to do it. But Landon was just going around in circles with Victoria and he could tell that Tierney was disappointed in him….which confused the hell out of him. Landon wanted to believe that Tierney was disappointed that he was still with Victoria because she wanted to be with him instead. But she seemed to encourage him to stay with her in the letter, which made him think that maybe she wasn’t interested at all. He’d spent so much time mulling this over in his head that he never found the time to write her back. The camp was over now and he was always with Victoria. They both knew that their relationship was on thin ice, but now it was a matter of whether or not Landon would keep it up.

Landon was outside working out while Victoria was taking a nap in his room. They’d just returned from a weekend of shopping in Paris with her mother. Landon did buy a few things for himself (and a load of things for Victoria), but he spent most of the trip sitting outside of dressing rooms, giving his opinion on accessories, and getting verbally abused for his “lack of style”. There were a few good moments on the trip, but they were overshadowed by thick clouds of misery. Victoria was a complete clone of her mother and it was absolutely soul crushing to have to spend an entire weekend with the two of them, but Landon sucked it up and dealt with it, as he always did. Now that they were back he was grateful for the time alone outside. Normally she would be right there beside him, attempting to tan, but she was too tired today so he’d come out alone. He’d already been running. Now he was working on some push-ups while listening to some music.

“LANDON!” So much for that. “Get your ass up here, NOW!” Landon glanced up and saw Victoria leaning out the window of his bedroom. She was seething, practically foaming at the mouth. He rolled his eyes and made his way back inside as he wondered what he could’ve possibly done now. He jogged up the stairs and down the hall, glancing at the door to Tierney’s room as he passed. He pushed the door to his room open to find Victoria with her back to him. “What is it, baby?” He found that pet names often helped calm her down when he knew hurricane Victoria was coming. “Don’t you dare baby me!” she said as she whipped around to face him. “What the fuck are these?” She waved around a few pieces of parchment in her hands and Landon knew exactly what they were. He stood there speechless staring at her, not sure of what to say. “Are you fucking stupid?” she screamed. “I’m talking to you! What the hell are these, Landon?!” She didn’t wait for him to respond. Instead, she started reading. “ I totally haven't missed you at all. Not an ounce. Okay, maybe a tiny bit. Or a lot. I don't know - it's just boring here so I miss having someone to talk to” She turned to another letter, pacing while she read. “ I'm doing my best to come back single, no heavy, ostentatious rock on my hand….I suppose your options are simply either you break it off or you deal with it. ”

“What is this shit, Landon? Why are you writing her?” She’d stopped facing him and was standing directly in front of him with her arms crossed over her chest, the letters squished in her right fist. The her was Tierney, and Victoria hated her more than ever this summer because she’d always sensed that something was going on behind her back. “She’s away for the summer. I was just keeping in touch.” Victoria all but rolled around the floor laughing at him. “Do you really expect me to believe that? Both of these letters are signed ‘love Tierney’.” Landon sighed. “So? We’re friends. I can’t write to my friends?” Victoria tossed the letters on the bed. “You must take me for some kind of idiot. You obviously complained to her about me and you’ve told her that you’re thinking about breaking up…And she’s trying to break off her engagement. You think I never noticed the way you both look at each other? Or how awkward you get when she’s in the same room as us?” Landon approached her and reached out her hand, but Victoria slapped his away. “You’re just paranoid.”

Victoria laughed at him again. “Paranoid? So you mean to tell me that you weren’t with her every time that you weren’t with me? I know that something is going on between the two of you.” Landon shook his head. “There isn’t. We’re just really good friends.” Victoria raised an eyebrow at him. “That’s it?” “Well,” Landon didn’t know why he was telling her this. But he knew that she could tell that he was lying so a little honesty couldn’t hurt. “We fooled around a little bit before you came back, but we ended it before you and I got back together. And it wasn’t anything serious.” Landon felt that should be enough to keep her off of his back. Telling her anything else would make this situation a whole lot uglier. He had no idea how they even ended up here. He had no idea that she had been watching him so closely. He’d completely underestimated her. “And that’s it?” Landon nodded. “So do you care to remind me what happened the night of your parents’ gala? You seem to forget that you left me stranded like a fucking moron.” “I told you,” Landon said. “We went to fix the button on my jacket and we ended up talking for a long time. Something was stressing her out and I just tried to help. We fell asleep.” Landon didn’t realize how stupid that lie sounded until now. Apparently Victoria got really angry that Landon didn’t return to the party and went home without saying anything to him. She wouldn’t speak to him for two days. When she finally did, he fed her this exact lie. And she bought it, or so he thought. Before he could even realize what hit him, he could feel stinging across his cheek.

“You really do think I’m an idiot, don’t you?”

“Vicki…”

“Did you sleep with her?”

“What?”

“You heard what I said. Did you sleep with her?”

“I –”

“Don’t you dare lie to me anymore!!” Tears were silently rolling down her face as she awaited the answer she knew was coming.

“Yes,” was all he could say. This was the most vulnerable he’d seen her in years. He couldn’t bear to lie to her while she was like this. She sat on his bed with her hands over her face as she sobbed. Landon just stood in the corner staring down at her, watching her cry.

“How many times?” Her head hung down and the tears dripped into her lap. “It was just the one time. I swear,” Landon said as he moved to sit next to her. “It wasn’t my intention to hurt you.” Victoria practically jumped off of the bed. “Then what the hell was your intention, Landon? How could you do this to me?!” She was still crying but her voice was filled with anger. “And don’t tell me that it just happened because that’s bullshit!”

“What you do want me to say?!” he finally yelled back. The anger from all the years of being stepped on was starting to surface. She was being such a hypocrite. “What about all those times that you cheated on me? Like an idiot, I just dealt with it and accepted your meaningless apologies.” Landon stood now, across from her, enraged. He didn’t really know where all of these feelings were coming from. He’d put up with her shit for so long that he was practically bursting at the seams. “I haven’t cheated on you since we got back together!! I told you that I was trying to change!! You never gave me a chance,’ she shrieked. “What about all those guys you were flirting with?”

“I never wanted any of those guys. I was just enjoying the attention they were giving me. You used to worship the ground I walked on. I used to be your world and now you just follow me around like a brainless puppy. You barely talk to me. You never tell me what’s going on in your life. You go to that slut.” It really hurt her that Landon didn’t ever feel like he could come to her to just talk. Landon didn’t see her as a friend. Tierney got Landon emotionally and physically. That left Victoria with nothing. He was a shell of a person when he was with her as of late. And for that, she was completely jealous of Tierney. She would never admit it though, so she always acted like she didn’t care.

“Merlin! You’re such a hypocrite!! First of all, you of all people have some nerve calling Tierney a slut. Secondly, Tierney cares about what’s going on in my life. She takes the time to ask me how I’m doing. But you, we spend so much time talking about you and your simple life. Don’t act like you give a shit about me. You treat me like crap and I just dealt with it because I thought you loved me. But you don’t love me. You don’t even know what love is!”

“Oh, and you do? You’re a little boy, Landon. You don’t know left from right, or up from down. You’re so damn sensitive. Someone always has to be holding your hand, leading you in the right direction. You’re so insecure. That’s why I am always berating you. I’m trying to help you grow the fuck up!”

“No! You’re trying to change me! You can’t accept me for who I am, for who I’ve become. You know what, though? You’re absolutely right. I don’t really know what love is, but I know it sure as hell isn’t this. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t keep going in these soul sucking circles with you.”

Victoria was livid. She couldn’t believe that after she had come all the way back to Hogwarts for him, he was going to try and break up with her. The tears had ceased and she was fuming. “After everything that we’ve been through, you’re going to leave me?” This wasn’t what she meant to happen when she confronted him about Tierney. He was supposed to apologize and crawl back on his knees, like a perfect boyfriend. They were the pureblood elite, a power couple. Her parents thought their relationship was brilliant for business. And she honestly did care about him. She just didn’t really know how to show it. Despite what either of them had said, she knew that there was a time that they both loved each other, long ago as it may have been. She could feel it, in the way he looked at her and the way they kissed. She knew those days were long gone, but she still couldn’t help but to hang on. Landon was who she knew best. He tolerated her and cared for her despite her many faults. She didn’t know what she would do without him. She didn’t want to know.

Landon could see Victoria slipping back into her state of vulnerability. She oddly resembled the girl he’d met just a few years ago, the girl that had completely captured him. Her nose was pink and the fresh tears forming in her eyes caused them to be shiny and bright. Her lips were pink and a little swollen from the crying. And at that moment, part of Landon wanted nothing more than to wrap her up in his arms and hug and kiss her, telling her that everything was going to be okay. He hated seeing her like this and the fact that he knew he was hurting her brought tears to his own eyes. But the other part of him, the bigger part, knew better than that. They couldn’t continue on like this. They both knew it. Landon didn’t think that Victoria was a nasty evil person. He knew that there was a loving girl underneath that hard exterior. That was what he’d found most attractive about her, was her strength and confidence but how she didn’t let those things overpower her kindness. But then something changed and that loving girl got buried deep down inside of her, to the point that Landon wasn’t sure if she’d ever resurface. He’d watched her emotions change so quickly from anger to sadness to rage to hopelessness. He knew that his ability to elicit all of the emotions out of her meant that she did care about him, but that just wasn’t enough for him anymore.

He grabbed her close and held her tight. She tried to wiggle her way out of his grip but eventually just gave up and cried into his chest. She reached her arms up around his neck and buried her face into the crook while rocked them to a fro slowly. “I’m sorry that I hurt you. I am sorry that we hurt each other. You and I both know that this is the best thing for us to do right now…so I can’t be with you anymore.” Victoria sniffled then peeled her wet cheek away from his skin. Her eyes were a little red now and the tears clung to hear long eyelashes. “I’m sorry.” Landon couldn’t remember the last time he’d heard her say that. He didn’t know how genuine it was or if she was just caught up in the moment, but he’d take it. “Are we done forever?” She hiccupped as she spoke. Her voice was a little deeper and a little hoarse and she was a bit congested. “I don’t know.” Landon didn’t want to say much more than that. He doubted he could ever be together again, especially now that they didn’t trust each other, but he didn’t expect them to get together a second time either. “Are you going to be with Tierney when she comes back?” Landon would no doubt try to pursue Tierney when she came back from Romania, but he really had no idea how she felt about him and wasn’t sure if it would work out. “I don’t know,” he replied again. “Despite all of this crap, I just want you to know that I will always care about you.” He held her face firmly in his hands and kissed her one last time. He wanted to relish this moment because he knew that, come tomorrow morning, she was going to hate him. And there was nothing like Victoria scorned.